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Printables and strawberries Holamos nildenya... I am sitting here on my bed listening to TTT soundtrack trying to block out my aching head and the never ceasing barking of shadow. I could almost drift off and not come back... fall into a sleep for a long long time... or at least until the weekend... Today was much different then my unexpectedly cheery monday yesterday, I was quite stressed and tired like a usual or worse than usual day. I dont know why I do it to myself, I procrastinate and procrastinate starting homework and still expect myself to be great and perfect. I know I'm smart but I'm really not trying at all. And then I come to despise all those who arent really that smart but are doing better than me because they do all the stupid hw and crap. Urggg I'm so contradictory sometimes i hate it. My perfectionism and procrastination dont work out too well. I mustnt think of school its just depressing. I stayed up til one am working on hw last night... or trying too... and fell asleep before i got ANYTHING done. I think i have problems. Then I woke up at 4:45, realized i had a whole AP lab plus a bunch of other crap to do and worked for 2 hours until i hadta take my shower and get ready for school. I swear I hate the way I am sometimes. After school yesterday I came home and let time rot away online, way too much. I need to join something or have crew more often to get my mind off of everything and on something constructive. Dont you hate it when you try to do something different and nice for once and you end up just getting yelled at for it. My dad nicely offered to go get us kids some fast food as long as we cleaned up a bit and blah de blah... and he told me to talk to everyone about what they wanted. So i felt like being devious and responsibly professional, so I figured I would type up a list of the food we all wanted. Timmy and caroline were upstairs so i took orders and was typing but timmy ran out in the middle and i guess i got distracted... So pretty soon it ended up that my dad was mad at me for not telling him what i wanted and writing caroline's order first and having to print twice, blarggg. But i did keep my lazyness, I didnt have to get up. Just type, click, and boom! it was printed downstairs. Wow I hate how time passes so fast sometimes. Tis already 5:45 :( This boring repetitiveness and lack of anything is really quite mindnumbing and depressing. It gives me time to write but then theres always a lack of inspiration when you sit inside at home in the glow of a computer screen. I'd rather be at nifty fifty's... with a strawberry milkshake and a medal in my hand... Just like last july. (well actually it was may but july is more poetic) My fattening fast food dinner has arrived, ciao. I'm sure will talk again nildenya...
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